Panic Attack

I got my appliance in. I was brave at first, taking it all in stride until I got home and I tried eating my first meal. What a nightmare! Sure it sounds like I’m exaggerating but for someone who loves food as much as I do this is probably one of the worst offenses I’ve had to endure. With this new intrusion in my mouth, basically a metal retainer that’s glued to the top of my palate just the simple act of chewing and swallowing my food has become a painstaking process.

That night I tossed and turned in bed. I dreaded what the next 9 months would be like with this new appliance handcuffed to the inside of my mouth. I couldn’t picture myself ever being able to get used to it. I started to freak out. It may well have been the closest I’d ever been to experiencing a panic attack. I could put a halt to this all right now, cancel the surgery and the braces I thought to myself and be done with it. So what, I have to have gum surgery for the rest of my life – Anything is better than having to deal with this hell! But then I reasoned that I had come this far with the process and I knew that it was the best decision for me so I had to stick with it.

Next thing I knew it was morning. I actually managed to fall asleep somehow. Things didn’t seem so horrible anymore, maybe I just had a chance to get over the initial fear of it all. I can’t say that I’m feeling completely at ease but I’m at least starting to get used to it. And that’s a good step forward since the worst is yet to come with my surgery around the corner.

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