Lately though it seems as if the universe (yeah, I admit J.J. Abrams’ Fringe is getting into my lexicon) is pulling me towards that guitar and perhaps putting pen to paper once again. I know something’s up when all in one train ride I go from ecstatic, fantastic bopping my head to Kimbra and then sink down to teary-eyed melancholia frowning to the regret-filled lyrics of Nada Surf.

I’m such a sensitive one.

I wish I was just joking when I say that but it’s too true. Also, I despise the fact that I let other people’s opinions of my music define my stance. Lately though, luckily for me, thanks to the encouraging words of a few gracious and kind people, I’ve been pushed once again into (perhaps delusion?!) that I should at the very least continue my pursuit with music.

Agh! I’m over thinking this as usual – “pursuit with music” – Please, way too serious! If you want to do something forget everything else (including yourself) and just do it. Yeesh, I really didn’t mean to end with the slogan from Nike.

As I climb out of my mini hibernation I run into my long estranged musical muse. I find it funny that I end up picking up the guitar and writing again on the very last weekend of my time off. On the train ride in to my first day back to work I happened to come across some old solo recordings that I did back in 2009. For the first time I realized that it was actually good. You have to understand that this is kind of a breakthrough for me since for years I resisted the notion that I could be a good enough musician on my own.

I don’t want to write any cheques I can’t cash, but it may be safe to say that I should be uploading some new songs for you to hear soon.

Just before I moved from my apartment of 10 years and into my first house, I was trying to get my album recorded. As most experiments that arise through trial and error, this one seemed to lean more on the side of ‘error’. My plan was to then go back to the drawing board (I got that saying right!) and redo the recordings myself with just guitar and voice. Clean, simple, back to the basics stuff – something that I’ve resisted for years because of my belief that my songs couldn’t possibly sound good enough with me on my own.

Ironically, just at the moment when I built up the self-confidence to record solo, I get that call from my old friend.

I’m happy either way.

As soon as I get caught up on my sleep I’m going to pick up the guitar and get writing. I’m even thinking of setting up the camera and taping some live recording sessions to share with you from my backyard. Anyone interested in seeing a 31 year old sing with braces on?

Ugh. Braces.

Ah, but it will be well worth the wait! With plenty of rooms to spare and a huge private yard surrounded by tall trees, I can take my guitar anywhere I like, at any time of the day or night and sing my heart out as loud as I bloody well please! I can’t tell you how much I am looking forward to that sense of freedom.

I’ve always been a bit too self conscious when it came to practicing in my living room here in the apartment. I resented the fact that I could potentially be overheard by someone passing through the building’s hallway – ridiculous I know. I should just not care and play right? Well, I won’t have to ponder this subject much longer. Come April 30th I’m outta here baby!

I’ve never been one for celebrations in my honour, but once I’m done with all this dental mayhem I will be throwing the biggest party ever! With crunchy and sticky food all around!

Right now though, I’m keeping it mellow, rinsing with salt water and eating soft foods while my mouth heals. The braces have left me with a bit of a temporary lisp but once I’m done with that I’ll get back to the task of recording my vocals.

Can’t wait!

In the case of making music, I would always be the first to question my abilities thinking “Oh, what I’m doing is too simple” or “I’m not a musician”. In reality, sure what I’m doing on the guitar is simple but it’s still music. Most of my favourite songs that I listen to over and over again are based around simplicity. Those are the most memorable. Perhaps, that’s what I have to remember, and not get caught up with the fact that I’m not creating crazy musical arrangements but rather a simple pop song.

Sometimes the most difficult thing in music or any art for that matter is accepting what you do to be that very thing that sets you apart and defines your own style.

As I sat down to listen to one of the songs once it was lined up with all the other tracks, a smile crept across my face… What a good feeling it is to at last feel comfortable in one’s skin. Even if these recordings don’t come out perfectly, they will at the very least provide an accurate representation of my songwriting ability.

Finally, this is my sound.